Is there anything better than a cheese and tomato sandwich, specifically one combining your favourite bread, a good hearty cheddar and slices of fresh, ripe but not overly juicy tomato*?

Why yes, yes there is, and it is this: a cheese and tomato sandwich, specifically one combining your favourite bread, a good hearty cheddar and slices of fresh, ripe but not overly juicy tomato, to which you have applied a discreet layer of this marvellous Dijon mustard/mayonnaise concoction. Nom nom nom.







*Question designed for rhetorical purposes only. I realise that there are, of course, things in this infinite and expanding universe that are better than a really top-notch cheese and tomato sandwich. But not many.

Once banned by the Christian church in Ethiopia this much meligned black infusion has caused a revolution in the modern world of social gathering. This simple substance, originating from northern Africa, spread in popularity around the near eastern world until the Muslim world brought it to Italy - there it saw the Italians start what would become a tradition of revolutionising simple food. In the same way that they have since transformed ice cream and the pizza, the Italians found numerous ways to extract absolutely every last drop of caffeine crazed goodness from the otherwise innocent coffee berry. Subjecting the bean to extremely fine grinding and then blasting it with in excess of three atmospheres of pressurised steam - the Espresso was born. Intensely bitter and extremely caffeinated, the humble Espresso led to hyper-gesticulation amongst the populous, a tendency countered by Pope Decafinous IV by the addition of frothy milk - creating the now legendary Cappuccino. It wasn't until 1909 when Michio Suzuki discovered that passing freeze dried espresso through a cornucopia device led to the miraculous creation of a small affordable sports saloon, that the truly universal application of coffee was appreciated to the full.

These days coffee is thought to be the most fundamental substance in the known universe, with the various brews aligning with the fundamental particles identified in the Standard Model. Pure coffee is thought to be represented by Leptons, where Coffee with Milk is represented by the Quarks. Up, down, strange and charm being various concentrations of frothed or straight milk with the ultimate - Skinny Soya Decaff Latte with an extra shot of caramel syrup - being the elusive Higgs Boson.

In 2008 CERN attempted to combine the fundamental physical theories - ice cream, coffee, and pizza, by creating a Bazil and Mozeralla Frappuccino in the Loughborough Hippy Cafe (or LHC for short) - unfortunately the refrigerant in the ice cream machine leaked onto the heaters for the water heater, so the experiment has been postponed. Many people believed that the experiment would concentrate all of the coffee in the earth into one tiny little place, and without the counteraction of the Ameretti Biscuit, would lead to the destruction of the known universe. Dr Feynman - one of the lead scientist on the programme - described this scenario as "Unlikely".

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It stands for 'Hot Buttered Toasted Cinammon and Raisin Bagel with Peanut Butter on it'

My plan had actually been to try the second half with jam too, however it was far too delicious to tamper with further.

Transcendental.

Wonderous; My mouth is still salivating with delight...
...See cookery board for the recipe

Well, when I first wrapped my teeth around one of these bad boys I was pleasantly surpised. They've started using real cumberland ring sausages and nice light baps. The grease isn't overwhelming in the McD style yet it's a solid meal to fuel a morning's work.
They are a little pricey though...

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I make a lot of curries, so i use a lot of ghee. We're having a party at work today and I'm making a curry, but I've run out of ghee. The only shop nearby that sells the stuff is 8th Day. I picked up a 300g jar, walked to the till, 'that'll be £7.45....'.

FUCK ME.

You can get a 5 litre drum of the stuff for that! Fucking hippies.

Here I will be posting my reviews of the many and varied pork pies I discover on my travels.

Please feel free to join in. I need to know where the best pork pies are.

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Not only do they preserve nice buildings and such, they also preserve various fruits and spices in jars. Very nice they are too.
Warm crusty bread, some uber-mature cheese, a jar of this chutney and some nice beer or scrumpy. Bliss.

hob nobs covered in chocolate orange. *drooooool*.

there are roughly 1000 calories in a pack. if you're a man this means you can eat two packs and still stay below your daily calorific intake of 2500.

It's Wednesday. You're hung over. You've got an important meeting at 11.30. A bowl of musli and some freshly squeezed wheat grass just isn't going to cut it.
You need grease and you need it fast.
If you've got a hang over and no one else can help, maybe you should hire:

The McD Team.







*So very, very wrong... yet so very right.*

Bitter, and slightly chalky.

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A Jamacan Style BBQ/Jerk Sauce invented by Reggae singer Levi Roots. Famous for being a Dragons Den success story.
Good and thick and dark smokey spicey flavours that go well with meat.
I've only had it in Sarnies so far but can't wait to try it with some grilled chicken!

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Do I need to explain? By definition, one of the best things you will ever have in your mouth.

EDIT: selection of Guiness recipes (including the cake) here:
http://www.karott.com/guinness_recipes.htm#Desserts

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And to take the subject even further...

It's garlic, it's soft, it's coriander, it's rich, it's tasty, it's bread product (always a winner in my book), it soaks up your curry and adds that bit more flavour, it's garlic naan. Best served on hooks!

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following on from kelly's previous post, and in an attempt to alleviate the air of naan naysaying, i'd like to express my stomach's utter delight at encountering keema naans. floury, soft naan bread with a layer of lamb or beef, or some other kind of tasty meat, sandwhiched inbetween.

this is taking naan to the next level!

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